45 Lessons In Life by Regina Brett

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio "To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone...
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay check.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Sometimes it's just not meant to be...

When you are a woman and you hit that certain age, you start to look at your life through a different pair of shades. My friends and I often talk about the future - work, men, kids, etc. But sometimes you have that friend or two that bases their entire being and their entire outlook on what's to come on being with someone. Having a partner. Invitations no longer saying "you plus guest."

Here's an interesting article I came across on MSN.com

http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/article.aspx?cp-documentid=24682705&GT1=32023

Seven Surprising Signs He'll Never Marry You
The tricky thing about womanizers is that they usually have their game down pat, which means it's easy to get sucked in. Here are some of the subtle clues a guy has a case of commitment phobia. If he exhibits three or more of these, watch out.

By Niki Evans

1. All of His Exes Are "Crazy"

Be wary of a man who refers to his former girlfriends as crazy, psycho, or clingy — because what's the common denominator here? Him. The dude's either looney-bin glue, or he never really wanted the relationship to work in the first place.

2. He Plans Ultra-Romantic Dates

A cozy candlelit dinner is nice and all, but if he only takes you to secluded places, it could be a tip-off that he doesn't want other women to spot him on a date. Next time he asks you out, suggest hitting up a busy restaurant or popular bar and see how he reacts.

3. He's Hot and Cold on the Phone

He'll text you 10 times in a night, then go MIA for days. He'll chat on the phone for an hour, then ignore your messages for the rest of the week. Wondering what the heck is going on? We're going to be brutally honest: He's mostly likely busy dating other women.

4. He Guilt-Trips You

It's normal for a guy to be jonesing to sleep with you from day one. But this behavior is a red flag if he a) lays the pressure on thick, or b) tries to make you feel bad if you choose not to get physical — like by giving you a sob story about how worked up he is without the release of sex.

5. Stuff Is Missing from His Facebook Profile

Has he untagged any photos of you and him? Does he post updates often, yet never mention hanging out with you? Is his relationship status hidden? We smell a rat. A guy who's leery of commitment will make sure there are no traces of you on his page.

6. His Buddies Act Distant

Even though a player's bros may be friendly enough, they probably won't ask you many personal questions about your job, interests, etc. The ugly truth: They don't want to invest time and energy getting to know you because they figure you're not going to be around very long.

7. He Says You're Soul Mates

Okay, we adore the idea of love at first sight — but too much too soon could also indicate sketchy intentions. If a dude comes on super strong right off the bat (we're talking the first couple of weeks), telling you things like that he's starting to fall in love with you, just make sure you play it safe and trust your gut. Those powerful words might be rolling off his tongue so smoothly because he's spoken them so many times before.

SOURCES: William July, Ph.D., Author of Confessions of an Ex-Bachelor and Jenn Berman, Psy.D., Relationship Expert for Cosmo Radio.

I'm sure we can all check off at least two of the seven insights above. Ladies... as Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo once said... He's just not that into you.

Oops! RETRACTION

After accidentally stumbling upon my blog (I left the window open on the computer), my partner read it for the first time - the post on the Antique Show.

During our vacation last week, he brought it up, proudly announcing that 'he read my blog!' He commented that my writing was pretty good and I only had one grammatical mistake...

Then I was advised that some information in there was actually incorrect. He really wanted to go to the Antique Show! He had worked that morning and had been up since 4:30 a.m. so he was a bit tired, but he was really looking forward to it and I did not have to "drag him there," as previously stated in my post.

So I now write a retraction - my partner was not dragged; he excitedly kept me company.

He caught the dragged part, but did not comment on being referred to as my better half... men.

Going antiquing

A few weeks ago I managed to drag my better half to attend the Christie Antique Show again. This was my second time going; last year we went to the May show as well (you can check out my buys here) and I think it's safe to say it is officially my hobby. The show started at 8:00 a.m. and with an $8 cover charge I was free to roam the million square feet of antique goodness.

This year I was on a mission to find a vanity table for my wardrobe room. One of the many pros of moving out of your parent's house into your own crib is that you can decorate the whole place however your heart desires. One of my must-haves was a bedroom that I can turn into a walk in closet (stay tuned for fotos).

So with a $500 budget, we set out to find the perfect vanity table, with a mirror, of course. I came across a few that were 'OK', but nothing that I have been picturing in my head. I wanted one with a few drawers and a place for a chair. There were a lot of dressers with a built in mirror, but nothing I can put a stool or a chair at.

Then I found THE most stunning vanity EVER. It was HUGE. Drawers and a mirror, a place for a fabulous chair. All for the reasonable price of $3,496. Unfortunately, I wasn't allowed to raise our $500 budget. Now that I think of it, it was probably too large for my closet room anyways.

Then, as we were shimmying up one of the isles, I looked over at one of the booths we have yet to see (as it was a few isles over) and I saw the back of it. There she was. I bolted over to take a closer look and she was perfect! The booth owner must have sensed my interest as we came right over and offered me a "good price" for this. I said great, how good? Keeping in mind that everything else I remotely liked was between $300 and $699 (err, $3,496).

He said $150!

So I pretended to contemplate this purchase a little bit, already picturing where exactly I would put it at home.

"But if you really want it, you can have it for a hundred and a quarter."

SOLD!

But a vanity isn't complete without a fabulous piece of furniture to sit on. So after a bit more walking I found a perfect upholstered stool for $25 - but I got it for $20. Note to future antiquers: as the day nears the end, you can score some sweet deals because everyone wants to get rid of their stuff so they don't have to load it all back on the trucks.

The stool actually matches the Merlot on the walls and white in the baseboards perfectly. Check out the pictures below.

The Christie Antique Show comes to Dundas, Ontario twice a year. The next one is on September 11. And I'll be in there like swimwear!

Helllooooo summerrrr!

It's here! It's here! It's here!

After a ridiculously below par summer of 2009, I'm sure I'm not alone when I say bring on the heat! There is no better feeling than laying on the sand with sun on your skin. Unfortunately, tanning conditions aren't what they used to be when we were kids.

I remember going on vacation with my mom and my aunt and we would always hang out on the beach. My aunt had this black bikini with pink polka dots and all she did - all day and every day - was lather on baby oil and fry in the sun. She was darker than chocolate by the end of the vacation. I was always so envious of her tan - maybe that's why I now have a complex about my pastiness.

Nowadays, UV rays are stronger, cancer is more common and really - who wants leathery skin at the tender age of 40.

Before stepping out into the sun with your sunscreen in hand, make sure you check the UV report that's conveniently available on the Weather Network's website. We spend at least eight hours per day online, it's right at your finger tips. You have no excuse. Check it. Now.

This week I'm taking off for a much needed week at Le Cottage. I've stocked up on beach towels, tried on all my bikinis (thank God it's during the week and NO ONE will be there to see this), reading materials and sunscreen.

Hawaiian Tropic always reminds me of the good ol' days of worry-tanning, but until recently, their products were available in highest SPF of 4 (that I know of)... Now Hawaiian Tropic offers sun protection up to SPF 70, in cream and lotion form as well as the ever-popular oil (still only SPF 4), with UVB protection and moisturizing vitamin E and aloe. There is also a complete line of after-sun care. Because let's be reasonable here - true sun lovers can overdo it now and then.

LOVE.

Maria Sharapova is living young... and so should you

As I have recently embarked on my neverending quest to diminish my wrinkles, I've made it a point to stay hydrated all day and every day. It's so easy to forget about drinking enough water when life takes over your days - you're stuck at work with a million e-mails to answer, run errands, pick up groceries, look for new shoes. You know, the usual. Carrying a Klean Kanteen everywhere I go isn't always an easy solution. It's hard to find space in my bag for the essentials: BlackBerry, organizer (I'm very old school and still like to write things down... with a pen), a book for the daily commute, lip balm, etc. I would need a separate fanny pack just to house my 3 lb water container...

During one of my regular trips to Metro, I came across evian Les Petites - a 330 ml bottle designed to fit into a kid's lunch box. Lunch box - hand bag. Potato - potahto. Convenient, easy to refill if need be and keeps my hydrated.

And I'm not the only supporter of evian - three-time Grand Slam tennis champion Maria Sharapova just signed on to be the new face of youth for evian. “The idea of youth as a state of mind caught my attention. I took a great pleasure in revealing my ‘baby inside’ while modeling for these photographs with Nathaniel Goldberg,” said Sharapova. “I am a true evian® drinker and I really like this campaign as well as the idea behind it so it felt quite natural to join in.”

What a perfect match (no pun intended).

If you haven't seen the evian baby coaches video, what are you waiting for. In the meantime, read up on evian Live Young training here. If that doesn't give you a kick in the behind to get healthy, well... call Jillian Michaels.

Quarter (and a bit) Life Crisis

A few weeks ago it hit me - I'm turning 27 this year. Twenty seven. I'm closer to thirty than I'll ever be to the young twenty five. I've never been one to give much thought to my age, especially when my other friends have been complaining about feeling older. I always thought of getting older as a sign of experience, knowledge and career success that's right on track. This year, however, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Three more years and I'm over the hill.

My metabolism is getting slower and slower and my face is starting to show lengthy welts some may call laugh lines. My clothes are getting tighter, I have more and more bills to pay. The only bonus is I no longer have regular loads of homework to do when I get home from school.

I've decided to "get my shit together." I signed up to a gym and I'm starting to work on my fitness. This cottage cheese will not go away on its own - especially now that I'm OLD. I've started doing research (and by research I mean asking my fabulous friends with fabulous skin) about budget friendly products to help me iron out my skin. Stay tuned for updates, I'll be sure to share.

Although I'm turning TWENTY SEVEN, I still feel like seventeen. Even my pops asked my one day if I will ever grow up. No thank you. I have a lifetime ahead of me to be serious. Life is more fun when you can laugh your way through it.